Are you Engaging in Skill-building Activities with Your Child?

When was the last time you enjoyed spending time with your children for their building their skills, considering the modern reality of working parents burdened by incessant work and scheduled appointments?

We're all familiar with the popular saying – ‘All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.’ As a parent, you might be confused about how to divide time for your child on structured activities and free play. It is thus significant to identify the type of structured activities you should engage your child with. And the good part is that these structured activities can be just as fun for your child as free play.

Children observe and apply what they learn. They need to be involved in regular physical activity and cognitively stimulating tasks to build their IQ. Building a strong knowledge base from learning leads a child to think creatively and critically. In this regard, focus is key.

Imagination is the next most essential aspect of your child’s development. When was the last time you saw your child express his or her imagination of a character or situation? Imagination helps children develop their brain functions as they come up with new ideas and apply them in the real world.

Skill-building—A holistic approach to child development

Skill-building is not only about developing cognitive abilities, but also has a major role to play in developing and managing a child’s behavioural traits or even etiquette.For example, if your child doesn’t know how to set the table, or put things in order, he or she might refuse to do it–because they can’t. The solution? Teaching them how.

Three key ways you can help children learn everything from basic self-care to more complicated social skills:

• Instructions
• Modelling
• Step by step

It is important to keep in mind that skill development is a gradual process and practice is necessary.

Problem-Solving using props and toys

Teach your child how to solve problems with items or objects they have in front of them. Some problem-solving prompts can be: Devise a slide for mini figures, create a jump ramp for cars, and build the highest tower you can. Dive deep into their imagination!

Prepare flashcards with story topics you would want to discuss with your child. Potential ideas can be: favourite winter memory, favourite holiday, the best birthday party idea, a dream you once had, or what you want to be. The skills practised with this activity include listening, following directions, patience, taking turns, ignoring distractions, and cooperating. Next, it’s your turn to select a card, set a timer (3 to 5 minutes), and tell your story. Children who find it difficult not to digress from the topic or lose focus easily are most likely to benefit from this activity. After your child narrates his or her story, to show that you were listening, summarize what was said and ask for clarification to help your child stay on track with the topic.

Interestingly, emotional development takes place simultaneously. For instance, now is also the time to teach your child how to empathize. For example, ‘That must have been hurtful for you’ or ‘I can see your feelings may have been hurt when your friend spoke with you like that’, depending on the line of the story your child chooses to share).

Playing a game requires patience, being able to wait and take turns, negotiation about who goes first (or what character piece or colour you are), agreeing to and sticking to the rules, and being a good sport whether you win or lose, says Dr. Shlisky, an advises making sure the game is appropriate for your child as per the age requirement. If it is complex or has too many instructions, your child might lose interest and give up. The child won't absorb the skills you really want them to, as a result. It is therefore best to keep it simple and fun.

Perspective development

This is an activity that involves identifying feelings and thoughts of others. You can do it while watching TV or a movie with your child, suggests Dr. Shlisky. Pause and ask your child, ‘What do you understand about how he or she feels right now? What could they be thinking?’ Listen to how your child responds, according to which can also pitch in or offer your own perspective: ‘I think they feel scared because they are being chased I think they feel happy because I see the rain stop and they can play outside.’ Audio-visual media are effective options for talking children through emotions and sentiments.

The Post-Pandemic Scenario

As we live through the new normal and continue maintaining social distance, learning activities among children have undergone a paradigm shift. Unfortunately, social distancing isn't all that social. Children naturally learn to socialize by being physically present amongst other children. When distanced from their peers, how are they going to absorb the social skills required to take them through school and college?

While remaining confined within the domestic space, parents can try to pick up the slack of what their kids are missing out on by engaging in targeted play at home that can be just as beneficial to their social awareness. Currently, we are only able to socialize with people outside of social distancing circles over the phone, through text, or on a video chat, says Francyne Zeltser, Psy.D., a child psychologist on Long Island, New York. Something as simple as having a virtual playdate with a classmate can teach your child so much—she has to make eye contact, she has to wait her turn, and she has to demonstrate the body language to show that she is listening. Just because we are home and cant physically attend social engagements, we can turn our day-to-day in-person and virtual interactions into teachable moments, Dr. Zeltser says.

Let’s get started…

Life skills are a set of abilities, attitudes and socio-emotional competencies that enable individuals to learn, make informed decisions and exercise rights to lead a healthy and productive life and subsequently become agents of change. Life skills promote mental well-being and competence in young people as they face the realities of life.

• Focus
• Self-control
• Perspective-building
• Effective communication
• Making connections
• Imaginative and Critical thinking
• Taking on challenges
• Self-directed, engaged learning

The journey of a parent is never easy when it comes to handhold one’s child through skill-building activities. However, to chalk out a mind map and follow it helps. The time to start is ‘now’—the most significant determinant of who your child grows up to be tomorrow. Therefore, what are you waiting for? Get started!